This'll take a while to type because I have a nasty cyst on my shoulder. I have named it Pustulio. It popped this morning and I won't go in to much detail about what was inside but I'll give you a little hint. "Cottage cheese".
So here are my answers:
1. Name your three favourite crushes?
The Baroness from G.I.Joe, peanut butter, my wife.
2. What do you get complimented on the most?
My awesome handstands. I haven't gotten all the way upright yet but people compliment me on my persistence.
3. How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
5,374,005. He's so strong! It's as if someone asked him if he wanted either invisibility, super strength or telekinesis and he chose super strength!
4. Flight, invisibility, super strength or telekinesis?
Super strength. I'm tired of looking like a sissy girl needing a bottle opener.
5. If you could go back in time 10 years and talk to yourself for 30 seconds, what would you tell yourself?
Carry a camera at all times because your buddy Jason is going to drop his hotdog in the gross gutter water then totally pick it up and eat it. You'll want proof to show others.
6. Is there a song which can bring you to tears instantly?
Nope. Too tough to cry. Songs cry tears when they think about me.
7. Who was the last person you talked about sex with?
My cat. Sex holds no meaning to him as he has no balls. I suppose it was cruel of me to bring up the topic with him....
8. Would you rather fight one horse sized duck or 100 duck size horses?
100 duck sized horses. I'd just eat em'. I'd be all "I'm bigger n' you. Get in mah belleh".
9. What would you do if you woke up tomorrow as the opposite gender?
Go smack out that bitch at work that I'd never hit because she's a woman. Take that! Take that!
10. Using the answers to number one, Kill one, shag one, marry one.
I'd kill some people butter. I'd chew it up and slowly digest it in mah belleh. I've already shagged my wife (looks around for someone to high five), and I'd marry my wife because I already have so now I don't have to pay for a second ceremony. WIN!
So I'm gonna tag:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 And here are your questions:
- What's scarier to you? Sharks, clowns, pulling out that gross drain hair in the bottom of the shower or commitment?
- What's the biggest joke to you? A man getting hit in the groin by a football? Someone eating a heap of wasabi that they though was mint gum? The state of your government?
- What game, comic or book do you hope gets made in to a live action movie?
- If someone was making a movie about your life, which actor would you cast as yourself?
- A friend asks you for $50. Do you tell them a lie and say you have no money as it's against your religion. Or do you say "Are you sure you wouldn't prefer a hundred" and run to the nearest machine to get money out. Or do you slap them in the face for having the nerve to ask a favour from someone of your obvious regal heritage.
- On your last day on Earth, what would you have for breakfast, lunch and dinner?
- Who do you want to look good for? Yourself, your friends or the opposite sex? Be honest...
- Favourite cartoons when you were little.
- What song you would you want playing at your funeral? (Mine would be Bad to the Bone by George Thorogood)
- If you were elected as ruler of the world, what's the first new law you would make?